She's actually very happy, my mother. Happier than anyone else I know. She lives entirely in the moment and is indeed experiencing a second childhood. The cast of characters in her mind consists mainly of her mother and father and her three brothers, whom she adored and who looked up to their big sister. Only one is still alive now. She's looking forward to the Queen's Jubilee celebrations, the Queen having been there all her life practically and part of the long-lost childhood where she spends her time. She still knows who I am, which is a real pleasure.
Born on a Prairie Farm in the wilds of Saskatchewan, her father having narrowly missed the catastrophe of the Titanic - a telegram from the farm manager calling him back early made him cancel his booking and take an earlier boat across the Atlantic - she will probably end her days under the wide skies of Suffolk, a place with which she has no real connection at all, just part of the random pattern of her life; of all our lives.
Dealing with all this has made me step back and reflect on my own life. To try and come to some sort of terms with the things that have happened and where I am now, the pattern of 'birth, death and the whole damn thing' as Elizabeth Luard so succinctly put it!
Dear Marianne, I guess that is the only consolation we can take from when the intellect deteriorates in someone we love. We feel that perhaps they are in a state of content, as they contemplations do no longer include worries or dark thoughts, instead only vivid recollections of the best part of their lives...
ReplyDeleteInteresting story of your mom's father, we never knwo the coming twists of our own fate.;)
xoxo
She does indeed seem to have achieved some sort of Zen-like state which is a good place for her to be. Watching the twist and turns of her life, I wonder where and how I will fetch up in the years to come. Who knows?
ReplyDeleteDear Marianne, just stopped by to wish you a lovely weekend and to thank you for always finding the time to visit me.;))
ReplyDeletexoxo
I hope you have a lovely weekend too Zuzana x
ReplyDeleteIt is hard isn't it? I am lucky still to have my mother just as funny and wise and kind as she always was. I have lost my brother though to a huge stroke. He is seriously disabled now. Every time I see him there are flashes of the person he used to be but they sit alongside some profound changes which are not simply physical. It still hurts after eighteen months or more. I am glad to hear that your mother is happy. To see someone not happy must be the worst thing. Best wishes to both of you.
ReplyDeleteThank you Elizabeth for the kind words. Enjoy your mother while she is herself! Mother's are to be treasured! Sorry to hear about what has happened to your brother. That is very hard for everyone to bear x
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